I Have...
by Charlie White
Do you know me? Well, after reading this list, you won’t really knoweverything about me but you’ll have a good idea of where I’ve been. I’ve tried to live life to its fullest, because after all, in my opinion, this is not a dress rehearsal! What have I done with my life? If anybody ever asks, here's my answer:
I Have...
- Spent two weeks in the rain forests of Costa Rica shooting a public television documentary
- Shaken the hand of President Bill Clinton
- Won an Emmy Award
- Been married three times
- Lost two children to stillbirth
- Visited the houses and graves of George Washington, Thomas Jefferson and Abraham Lincoln
- Stood in the rotunda of the US Capitol
- Stood on the grave of Charles Darwin in Westminster Abbey
- Flown in the Goodyear Blimp
- Braced myself for a plane crash because of a landing gear emergency
- Seen the original US Constitution and Declaration of Independence
- Played saxophone in a marching band for President Richard Nixon
- Been a cameraman at a Jimmy Carter speech while he was president
- Been an audio assistant for a George H. W. Bush speech
- Seen a man shot in the head 15 times and killed
- Recorded an album for CBS Records
- Driven Mitch Miller to his broken-down van in my car
- Was an artist’s model for a painting of a joker used on a corporate Christmas card
- Been to Europe three times and Asia once
- Lost three close friends to cancer
- Witnessed the birth of two daughters -- one dead, the other alive
- Played in a bluegrass band, jazz quintet, salsa band, big band, rock-and-roll band, symphony orchestra, concert band, marching band and sung in a choir
- Directed a large number of live national television broadcasts
- Sung by myself in an auditorium for 3000 people as part of a talent contest, and won first prize
- A wife whom I met when she was a model on a video shoot I was directing
- Heard the Mormon Tabernacle Choir singing in the Mormon Tabernacle
- Heard the London Symphony Orchestra in the Royal Albert Hall
- Ridden as a passenger in an Acura NSX exotic sports car through the desert at speeds in excess of 150mph
- Been in the production truck of Monday Night Football during its live broadcast
- Visited William Shakespeare’s home at Stratford-Upon-Avon
- Had my television camerawork broadcast on the CBS Evening News with Walter Cronkite
- Climbed on the rocks at Stonehenge before they stopped letting people do that
- Sat first chair tenor saxophone in the North Carolina All-State Band
- Piloted an airplane (taxi, takeoff, VFR flight and assisted landing)
- Earned money playing guitar, saxophone, clarinet, flute, piano and organ
- Played saxophone professionally on regular gigs for 12 years
- Been able to play jazz drums and bass since high school
- Written at least 200,000 words each year since 1999
- Been the voice-over talent for two years' worth of car commercials, among many others including the Harlem Globetrotters, Monster Trucks and a funeral home
- Written the most widely-read article in Digital Media Net’s history
- Designed and supervised construction to completion of a 3500-square-foot house
- Worked as personal assistant to Bob Keeshan (Captain Kangaroo) -- whose birthday is on the exact same day as my father's (June 27, 1927) -- for two days
- Played tenor drum in the drum corps of a marching band, and wrote all the cadences we played
- Dragged Edward Kennedy while he was sitting in a chair (with his permission)
- Learned to speak halting and vulgar street Spanish and barely passable French, but can't anymore
- Not celebrated Christmas for many years because of my evidence-based beliefs
- Went on the road with a big band when I was 16 without missing any school
- Heard the New York Philharmonic with Leonard Bernstein conducting (in Central Park)
- Eaten frog legs
- Interviewed The Amazing Randi (James Randi) for a story I was working on
- Flown in a helicopter while directing a video shoot
- Chug-a-lugged two liters of beer in less than 10 seconds without taking a breath
- Run the 40-yard dash in 5.0 seconds
- Been a professional dishwasher for two weeks
- Played saxophone on a live, internationally-televised telethon
- Gotten motion sickness from playing a first-person-shooter computer game
- Met and had an extended conversation with Ralph Nader
- Walked 26 miles in one day, three times, for charity
- Driven 1000 miles alone in one sitting, four times
- Directed national sewing, cooking, business, parade and astronomy television broadcasts
- Stood at the rubble of the World Trade Center soon after it was destroyed
- Experienced the sudden death of a young parent
- Designed the blueprints and installed the wiring for my home theater
- Run two miles a day for seven years
- Seen someone shooting heroin (but didn’t join in)
- Stayed at ten different hotels in Las Vegas
- A stepson who lives in Alameda, California
- Injured my stomach on a thrill ride in Las Vegas
- Baked a chocolate cake from scratch
- Predicted a life-changing event would happen on July 7, 1990, which turned out to be the first day I lived in Milwaukee, where I have lived ever since
- Driven a car in excess of 120 miles per hour
- A wife who believes in life after death, but I disagree with that
- Seen two men fighting over a loaded gun in a parking lot; the gun fired, striking the pavement
- Taught an airline pilot how to use Photoshop CS5 while we were flying (he was also a passenger at the time)
- Eaten blue corn chips on the top of a mountain
- Worked for two years as a professional drive-time announcer at a classical public radio station
- Played organ and guitar for a church service
- Been part of a chase crew that launched a hot-air balloon
- Walked 4 miles daily for two years
- Participated in a computer-building race for charity but didn't win
- Visited the house and grave of my uncle Samuel F. Miller, who was a Justice on the United States Supreme Court, nominated by Abraham Lincoln
- Lived with undiagnosed hypothyroidism for two years
- A daughter who is a descendant of John Adams, as well as John Alden from theMayflower
- Worked on at least one job since I was 12 years old
- Been in jail twice, acquitted both times of any wrongdoing
- Lived next to a convicted murderer and confronted him about making too much noise
- Graduated from the University of Miami in 1978
- Attended a taping of the NBC show Tomorrow with Tom Snyder in New York in 1980
- Downhill skied in excess of 45 mph for one mile without falling
- Been called a "fucking idiot" by Apple CEO Steve Jobs for writing a column about Apple which was true
- Attended what many sports commentators have called the greatest football game ever played, a Monday Night Football game where the Miami Dolphins handed the Chicago Bears their only loss of the 1986 NFL season
- Been hospitalized for a life-threatening infection
- No credit card debt, and haven’t for years
- Lost more than 50 lb. three times
- Moved 20 times since birth
- Caught a nine-pound rainbow trout in Lake Michigan and then did not cook it nor eat it
- Learned to direct TV by eavesdropping on Don Roy King, then directing Good Morning America -- he's now directing Saturday Night Live
- Thrown up on a school bus
- "Flown" in a flight simulator for L-1011 jets
- Grown up in a family where competition was more important than camaraderie
- Exchanged emails with Roger Ebert twice, and he used my comments in his column
- Quit smoking for good after numerous unsuccessful attempts
- Worked as a cameraman on a TV show where the anchorman swallowed a housefly rather than spit it out on live TV
- Had cosmetic surgery to improve my personal appearance
- Stood two feet away from a coyote without it knowing it
- Read 100 books in a summer
- Never shoplifted, but have downloaded music without paying for it
- Had my column read regularly by Bill Gates, according to his assistants
- Earned a position on the high school varsity football team and then promptly quit
- Broken 100 in golf and broken 200 bowling
- Trained for and passed the test for a real estate sales license in the State of Florida
- Flown in two different types of seaplanes
- Rescued a damsel in distress by changing her flat tire
- Run two miles through a hurricane
- Been to a topless beach in Key West
- Won a Ferrari laptop in a drawing, then donated it to my daughter's middle school
- Baked a chocolate soufflé that didn’t fall
- Climbed to the summit of Grandfather Mountain multiple times using all five trails
- Been to four Cirque Du Soleil performances, the best entertainment events I've ever seen
- Worked on the political campaign of George McGovern in 1972 and then met him and had a pleasant and extended conversation with him 25 years later
- An IQ that's one point lower than my daughter's
- Not used any drugs for many years and rarely drink
- Worked in broadcasting in one way or another from 1974 - 2007
- At one time had five jobs I was working on at the same time; two of them were full-time
- Played organ with a symphony orchestra for a world premiere of a Pulitzer prize-winning composer’s work
- Held in my hand the same burgundy-colored Mont Blanc ballpoint pen (given to me by my late father) during every television program I’ve ever directed
- Been to the top of the tallest building in North America (Sears Tower) three times
- Attended every Jewish ritual except a bris
- Refused the marriage proposal of a Colombian woman who needed to marry a gringoso she wouldn’t be deported
- Once asked to be let back into jail and wasn’t drunk (it’s a long story)
- A daughter who makes straight A's and scored 31 on her ACT, but is highly disorganized
- Spent four consecutive days in intensive care because of atrial fibrillation (a heart condition)
- Witnessed a Space Shuttle Challenger launch up-close from the press area at Kennedy Space Center
- Won a Wisconsin Broadcasters Award for writing, producing and directing the promo of the year
- Had a valet parking attendant bring me the wrong car, which my key was able to start
- A pair of robins building a nest above our front door every spring
- Had a vicious dog chasing me, but just before he bit me, a car ran him over, killing him
- Lived in a loft for three years that was formerly the refrigerator of a brewery
- Seen a musician sitting next to me in a recording session have a grand mal seizure due to cocaine abuse and carted away in an ambulance, after which he falsely accused me of stealing $200 from him
- Acted as my own attorney in a divorce proceeding, and had a fool for a client
- Been caught speeding in excess of 120mph but paid off the state trooper with $25 and was released
- Resigned from the Methodist Church when I was 16, told the preacher in his office, “I quit”
- Traveled to every major city in the US except Dallas and Portland
- Heard a news producer with whom I was working at the time cheering when she first heard the news of the terrorist bombing of Pan Am Flight 103 over Lockerbie, Scotland, yelling about how it was going to be a “great story” on our newscast that night
- Written a comment to a Salon columnist about that producer’s behavior regarding the Lockerbie crash, who used that comment in his column
- Written a jazz band arrangement of Glenn Miller’s “In the Mood,” which was publicly performed
- Moved to a new city, alone, without knowing anybody
- Seen a broken baseball bat fly into the stands at a major league baseball game, hitting the girl sitting beside me
- Learned how to play the banjo, Earl Scruggs style
- An overly active olfactory sense but reduced color sense and damaged hearing
- Directed my wife as she operated a camera on a multicamera television shoot
- Climbed the stairs to the top of the Washington Monument
- Met and photographed a porn star
- Written articles for Wired, Popular Science, Maximum PC and I.D. magazines
- Ridden a fast horse at top speed and enjoyed it
- Cut a living human umbilical cord with a pair of surgical scissors
- A tooth that was turned 180 degrees when it first erupted in my mouth as a child
- Seen the Green Bay Packers with Brett Favre as quarterback play at Lambeau Field
- A collection of dozens of name tags from press events
- Music playing in my head most of the time, sometimes against my will
- Lived in Wisconsin for 21 years and liked it a lot
- Carried a coffin (with my grandfather's dead body inside) and almost dropped it
- A brother-in-law who won the Pulitzer Prize for Music
- An interest in architecture, especially Palladianism and the work of Frank Gehry, Santiago Calatrava, Zaha Hadid and Frank Lloyd Wright
- Stood in front of the Mona Lisa at the Louvre
- A collection of stickers, affixed to an old metal trash can, that I've been adding to since 1974
- Played in a four-piece bluegrass band while sitting on top of a moving car, damaging the roof
- Befriended a Blue and Gold Macaw named Chazz, who lived in my house and called me by name every day for two years
- Created a weekly podcast called Coolness Roundup, which ran for five years and 235 episodes
- Written a monthly column in three different national magazines for a total of five years
- Been a cameraman on a nationally-broadcast tennis match played by Jimmy Connors
- Copy-edited two internationally-distributed books
- Seen UFOs twice, but don't believe they're alien spacecraft
- Swam a mile
- Seen a person born and a person die
- Been discriminated against because of my race
- Never missed a day (or even a minute) of work because of drugs or alcohol
- Fallen off the back of a moving car
- Completed a paper route in freezing rain, after which my raincoat was frozen solid enough to stand up in the corner
- Missed a dentist appointment because his office had burned down that morning
- Taken an annual trip to Arlington Park horserace track with my daughter for four years in a row
- Given numerous hour-long speeches in front of large roomfuls of people
- Ridden a Harley-Davidson motorcycle
- Had shoulder-length hair and a beard
- Been bitten by a bird
- Spotted the rare and elusive Resplendent Quetzal in the Monteverde Cloud Forest Preserve of Cost Rica, said to be the most beautiful bird in the Western Hemisphere
- Seen the Northern Lights (aurora borealis)
- Little patience for vicious animals and the people who love them
- Been to a party on an aircraft carrier
- Driven a Corvette through the desert at 100mph
- Had my tonsils out
- Caught a moray eel while deep sea fishing
- Had a tornado knock down five trees in my yard, but I wasn’t home at the time
- Installed a completely automated home lighting system in 1993
- Written a 1,000-word article every working day for a month
- Worn a solid-gold Rolex watch for 25 years
- Founded my corporation: tempamatic inc
- Installed a water faucet
- Watched a warehouse burn to the ground
- Written a 71,000-word book with my writing partner, sold it to a publisher, collected an advance and (hopefully) royalties
- Been dealt a royal flush in Texas Hold 'Em poker
- Walked across Hoover Dam
- Taught guitar lessons at the same place where I took my first guitar lessons
- Appeared on the Indian version of MTV
- Complained about grammatical errors on a blog and then they hired me to fix them
- Given bad reviews to (bad) products presented to me by long-time friends
- Run five miles
- Stood on a runway under a Boeing 747 taking off
- Been a day trader of stocks for three months (broke even)
- Been attacked by a cloud of mosquitoes in the Florida Everglades
- Spent three months learning how to play a James Taylor song on the guitar
- Eaten key lime pie in the Florida Keys
- Begun a quest to find the best burger in the world
- Covered George W. Bush with the White House Press Corps
- Hired a billionaire (Peter Buffett) for a freelance project
- Written 4,484 blog posts on Gizmodo over two years
- Been interviewed for articles by a woman in Israel, a man in Iraq, and a woman in India
- Walked 1,000 miles in a year, measured by a wrist GPS device (9/15/05 - 9/15/06)
- Corrrectly predicted a home run would be hit on the next pitch at a major league baseball game
- A great-great-great-grandmother who danced with Abraham Lincoln at his inaugural ball in 1865
- Stood in the rock rubble underneath Mount Rushmore
- Created a viral video on YouTube that has been viewed more than 2.6 million times
- Looked down into a Minuteman missile silo with a missile inside
- Created a computer typeface called "Helen" in Fontographer software; the font was based on my former mother-in-law's calligraphy
- Eaten ice cream atop a 10,450-foot mountain peak near Jackson Hole
- Accidentally run over three rabbits in one night
- A wife who had speaking parts in two national television advertisements for Walgreens
- A stepsister killed by a drunk driver
- Stood among the Bartolotta Fireworks firing team while they launched 10,000 mortar shells on the 4th of July
- Given four presentations to Warner Brothers executives on the Warner Backlot in Hollywood
- Been interviewed by BBC Radio World Service while I was in Mumbai, India
- Told my father he was going to die, and helped him cope with his impending death
- Seen a three-year old girl with a starving newborn infant in her arms, begging for food
- Drove a Chevy Volt at a press event at the GM test center in Detroit
- Had food poisoning aboard a Singapore Airlines Boeing 747 flight from Tokyo to L.A., was hospitalized after suffering for 10 hours
- Hiked 12 miles in total darkness in Wisconsin's Kettle Moraine, no flashlights allowed
- A daughter who had 6-hour spinal fusion surgery to cure her scoliosis
- Written more than 2,200 posts for DVICE, an NBC tech and consumer electronics site, from 2007 - 2010
- Worked for more than a year as Senior Editor at Mashable, the world's 2rd most-powerful blog.
- Seen Barack Obama give his 2008 victory speech in Grant Park in Chicago
- Written a long, long list, which was oddly enjoyable for me
Press coverage of Charlie White:
"Charlie White -- Senior Editor, Mashable" on Cision Navigator
"Cool Geek of the Week" on Born Rich
Blog Spotlight: Charlie White of Gizmodo
Bio
Resume
Comments welcome: email me at chazz@charliewhite.net
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